Men Behaving Badly — Duh!

Welcome back to Powerful Men Behaving Badly: The Weiner Edition. Sadly there's a lot of competition, but this episode may be the stupidest and most pathetic of all.

In fact, this type of behavior has become so common, that there was reportedly a collective rolling of the eyes and a distinct sense of, "Here we go again" among the women of the House of Representatives last week when Rep. Anthony D. Weiner confessed his, "terrible mistakes" and declared himself, "deeply sorry for the pain" he had caused in sexual escapades so adolescent as to almost seem laughable.

Which begs the question: If women controlled Congress and the House of Representatives and were also the majority CEO’s at major U.S. companies, would we see the same sexual exploits and illicit behavior that has landed numerous male power-figures in recent — and very public — hot water?

That provocative question was addressed today on ABC’s This Week, with Christiane Amanpour, which featured Cecilia Attias, Torie Clarke, and Claire Shipman in the news show’s “Roundtable” segment.

According to the panelists, and others who have been asked the same question, the answer is a resounding, “No!”

"I'm telling you," said Rep. Candice Miller, R-Mich., "every time one of these sex scandals goes, we just look at each other, like, 'What is it with these guys? Don't they think they're going to get caught?'”

The panelists all raised an intriguing point: Female politicians rarely get caught up in sex scandals. Women in elective office have not, for instance, blubbered about Argentine soul mates like former South Carolina Gov. Mark Sanford; been captured on federal wiretaps arranging to meet high-priced call girls like former New York Mayor Eliot Spitzer; resigned in disgrace after their parents paid $96,000 to a paramour's spouse like former Nevada Senator John Ensign; or, as in the case of Weiner, blasted lewd self-portraits into cyberspace.

It would be easy to file this under "men behaving badly," to dismiss it as a testosterone-induced, hard-wired connection between sex and power (powerful men attract women, powerful women repel men). And some might conclude busy working women don't have time to cheat. ("While I'm at home changing diapers, I just couldn't conceive of it," Sen. Kirsten Gillibrand, D-N.Y., once said.)

While all of these explanations have genuine merit according to researchers, there may also be something else at work: The panelists and others point to additional research that has found a substantial gender gap in the way women and men approach running for office, and behaving once they are there.

Women have different reasons for running, are more reluctant to do so and, because there are so few of them in politics, are acutely aware of the scrutiny they draw — all of which seems to lead to differences in the way they handle their jobs once elected.

"The shorthand of it is that women run for office to do something, and men run for office to be somebody," said Debbie Walsh, director of the Center for American Women and Politics at Rutgers University. "Women run because there is some public issue that they care about, some change they want to make, some issue that is a priority for them, and men tend to run for office because they see this as a career path."

This Week’s Roundtable agreed, saying that most women CEO’s are similarly motivated. They want the company to succeed, rather than being competitive for competitiveness sake, or seeking self-aggrandizement.

Once elected, women feel pressure to work harder, said Kathryn Pearson, an expert on Congress at the University of Minnesota. "I have no hard evidence that women are less likely to engage in risky or somewhat stupid behavior," Pearson said, adding women hold office with an extra level of seriousness.

Panel members cited research that found country’s that seek to balance gender positions in political and business arenas tend to be more successful, and have few or even no public sex scandals.

Let me be clear: The panel was in no way denigrating males. Panelists were merely underscoring credible research that tends to support the conclusion that high levels of testosterone in men mixed with occupations that pair a sense of power and entitlement may create an atmosphere for some men to act out in very risky sexual behaviors. A perfect storm, if you will, that often lays waste to their careers and their families.

The panel’s discussion was prompted by Democratic Weiner’s announcement today that he was taking a leave from his public duties and entering a “treatment” facility, purportedly for sexual issues. This unexpected action followed a week of worsening revelations that the married politico participated in graphic “sexting” with at least six women spanning three years.

Ironically, Weiner’s wife Huma Abedin, is in Abu Dhabi as an aide to Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, who endured her own world-wide humiliation when then President Bill Clinton cheated in the White House with an intern, and was impeached as a result. Abedin, who has been married to Weiner for a scant 11 months, has admitted that she is pregnant with their first child.

Today’s announcement also came on the heels of his admission that one of the women was a 17-year-old from Delaware. That was apparently the last straw for House Democratic leader Nancy Pelosi of California. Yesterday, she issued the following statement: Weiner "has the love of his family, the confidence of his constituents and the recognition that he needs help. I urge Congressman Weiner to seek that help without the pressures of being a member of Congress."Aides said later that Pelosi had been aware of Weiner's plan to enter treatment when she issued her statement.

Pelosi was the latest Democrat, along with numerous Republicans, who have urged Weiner to resign in a growing chorus that insiders have said left the Congressman shaken, but nonetheless resolved to remain in power.

“Powerful men behaving badly” has become a media and late-night comedy mainstay — only their faces have changed. The vast majority of all of these men have initially denied doing the deed, then admitted that they did the deed(s), then apologized — often tearfully — to their wives, fans, constituents, etc.

Most of their long-suffering wives have stood by them, albeit with some notable exceptions: The wives of Superstar Golfer Tiger Woods; former New Jersey Governor Jim McGreevy; Sampson; and former Sen. John Edwards all divorced their straying spouses. Maria Schriver, wife of former California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger, has left her philandering spouse, who has also fathered a child outside of his marriage. It remains to be seen if she will seek a divorce.

In fact, this week also brought Edwards’ indictment on charges of misappropriation of campaign funds, accusing him of using $100,000 to cover-up his affair with a woman who eventually bore his daughter so that he could continue his bid for the presidency.

Some of these male misbehavers have somehow managed to rehabilitate their public careers. Bill Clinton is now widely admired as a senior statesman.

Interestingly, the panel said they believe that no woman who committed the sexual dalliances that any of the above mentioned males had committed, especially Clinton as president, would ever be forgiven by the public.

Weiner's 9th Congressional District spans parts of Brooklyn and Queens. A civic group and other residents of the district plan to rally Sunday afternoon to demand Weiner's resignation.

A quiet departure would enable Democrats to get back on message and not be disrupted by an embarrassment that only months ago led to the resignation of a Republican congressman whose seat turned over to Democrats in a special election last month.

Weiner's spokeswoman, Risa Heller, said in a statement that the congressman departed Saturday morning "to seek professional treatment to focus on becoming a better husband and healthier person. In light of that, he will request a short leave of absence from the House of Representatives so that he can get evaluated and map out a course of treatment to make himself well."

The statement did not say where or what type of treatment he was seeking. In order to take a leave of absence, a usually routine matter, the request must be sent to the House floor. This is usually a perfunctory, moot exercise, with no one objecting, but it is conceivable that his leave could face objection and not be granted. If so, a vote could ensue on the merits or demerits of granting leave, putting Congress in uncharted territory.

Weiner's decision to seek treatment followed his acknowledgment that he had exchanged online messages with the 17-year-old girl in Delaware. Weiner and the girl's family attorney said nothing improper had passed between the two of them, and that the state police have closed an investigation.

The pathetically striking thing about the Weiner episode is that it is so juvenile: A grown married man taking pictures of himself in his boxers and sending them on Twitter; a grown married man allegedly messaging a different Facebook female friend about the "ridiculous bulge in my shorts now. wanna see?"

Weiner's explanation was also excruciatingly stupid and familiar: "I don't know what I was thinking."

— The Curator

SAVE This Woman, Please!

An urgent petition has been launched to save the life of Sakineh Mohammadi Ashtiani, the Iranian woman sentenced to death by stoning, after reports that she was to be hanged for murder TODAY!

Mohammadi Ashtiani was convicted of the double charge of adultery and conspiring to kill her husband, and received 99 lashes. Her case provoked an international outcry when it first came to light earlier this year. Iran suspended her sentence to be stoned to death in September, but the country’s judiciary chief made it clear she could still face execution by hanging for an alleged role in the plot to kill her former husband.

In August, Iranian television aired an interview in which she admitted to a relationship with a man accused of murdering her husband, but rights groups have said the confession was coerced. Mohammadi Ashtiani is awaiting her fate in a prison in Tabriz, a city in north-west Iran. Her lawyer was arrested in October.

Even though the 43-year-old mother of two's sentence was suspended in the face of an international outcry the International Committee against Stoning said on its website that Mohammadi Ashtiani "is to be executed this Wednesday 3 November."

I, along with most other bloggers, have reported on this tragic case since it first came to the attention of the international community, adding my voice to thousands of others urging her to be spared.

A spokeswoman for the German-based organization said this morning that it now understood Mohammadi Ashtiani would not be executed today, but said Iran was still planning to go ahead with the execution, which could take place in the next few days.

"The International Committees against Stoning and Execution call on international bodies and the people of the world to come out in full force against the state-sponsored murder of Sakineh Mohammadi Ashtiani," she said.

In addition, governments here and abroad also appealed to Iran to spare Mohammadi Ashtiani.

The global civic advocacy network Avaaz.org responded to the reports by launching an online petition urging people "to send an emergency message directly to the leaders of Turkey, Brazil and key UN nations who could sway Iran to halt the execution."

The goal is to reach 500,000 names. When I signed the petition, the total number of names was almost at 450,000. It's no wonder that "Ashtiani" has become one of the most widely discussed subjects on Twitter.

The boiler plate language of the petition follows, but anyone signing it can change the wording to reflect their own views:

“To leaders who can influence Iran:

I urge you to do all you can to save the life of Sakineh Mohammadi Ashtiani.

Reports state she could be executed on November 3rd. Your help could sway the government of Iran to halt her execution, just as it did this July and August.

Please take immediate action today to persuade Iran to spare her life.

Sincerely...”

In the U.S., Canada and in Great Britain leaders spoke out against the threatened execution.

The White House condemned the planned execution and called on Tehran to "provide Ms. Ashtiani with the due process and fair treatment she deserves."

In a separate statement, Secretary of State Hillary Clinton said Iran's leaders "have failed once again to protect the fundamental rights of their own citizens, particularly women."

"Ms. Ashtiani's case has not proceeded with the transparency and due process guaranteed under Iranian law, and we are concerned about reports of coerced confessions and other mistreatment," Secretary Clinton said.

British Foreign Office Minister for the Middle East Alistair Burt echoed those views yesterday, saying "I am deeply disturbed by suggestions that Sakineh Mohammadi Ashtiani could be executed imminently. Any move to execute her would be utterly unacceptable and would be condemned widely and in the strongest terms. The world watches and waits."

Minister Burt later spoke to the charge d'affaires at the Iranian embassy in London, who was unable to confirm or deny reports of Mohammadi Ashtiani's imminent execution. He told the diplomat that her death would be condemned throughout Europe.

A letter signed by 119 British MPs, calling on Iran to live up to its commitments as a signatory of the International Declaration of Human Rights, was delivered to the Iranian embassy in London.

British Foreign Secretary William Hague warned Iranian authorities against going ahead with the punishment, saying it would hurt Iran's international relations.

"This is a barbaric punishment and it will damage Iran in the eyes of the world. It will be much better not to proceed with it," Hague told reporters in the West Bank city of Ramallah, during a visit to Israel and the Palestinian Territories.

The EU high representative, Lady Ashton, was said to be "deeply concerned" about the reports. "She demands that Iran halts the execution and converts her sentence," a spokesman said.

The U.K. Foreign and Commonwealth Office said it had also been unable to confirm whether the reports of Mohammadi Ashtiani's imminent execution were true.

The Canadian government too was “deeply troubled” by these reports. Addressing Iran's President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad directly, Laureen Harper, the wife of Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper wrote: "We urge you to take a progressive step towards improving the lives of Iranian women, mothers, daughters and sisters by unconditionally releasing Sakineh Mohammadi-Ashtiani. Certainly, this would be welcomed by women around the world as seen as a deeply symbolic gesture toward the betterment of all Iranian women."

Canadian Foreign Affairs Minister Lawrence Cannon responded to the news in the House of Commons yesterday.

“Our government is deeply troubled by reports that Iran may be moving forward with its plans to execute this woman,” Cannon said. “The appalling treatment of her is completely out of line with international standards and the rule of law.”

Marina Nemat, an Iranian-Canadian author who was tortured in Iran and has campaigned with Indigo Books and Music CEO Heather Reisman to save Mohammadi Ashtiani, said the execution may or may not be imminent, as little is clear when dealing with Iran.

“I’m keeping my hopes up because the question is what the Iranian regime would gain from killing this woman,” Nemat said. “The world would be outraged.”

Canada has imposed several rounds of sanctions on Iran stemming from United Nations Security Council resolutions, and in July announced unilateral sanctions that, among other things, ban Canadian investment in Iranian oil and gas projects. Canada has also issued several statements condemning Iran, and for the last seven years presented an Iran resolution at the U.N. General Assembly that highlights the country’s record of human-rights failures.

Payam Akhavan, an Iranian-born international law professor at McGill University, said the stoning case reflects a broader conflict in Iran, as a hard-line regime under threat from a democracy movement tries to maintain its hold on power. He said Mohammadi Ashtiani is one of more than 30 women threatened by stoning in a country that now has the world’s highest per-capita rate of executions.

“This is part of the terrorization of the people,” Prof. Akhavan said. “When you start executing large numbers of people in heinous ways, you’re sending a message to the public at large.”

Prof. Akhavan said Canada should follow the lead of the United States, which in September issued an executive order against eight senior members of the Iranian regime, including the commander of the Revolutionary Guard, which allows the U.S. to seize their assets, block their travel to the U.S. and prevent Americans from doing business with them.

“The signal that it sends is that we’re not just issuing a U.N. resolution condemning the government,” Prof. Akhavan said. “We are blaming you, individually, and your name has now been carved in stone and one day when you’re not in power everyone will know who you are.”

As could be predicted, Tehran accused the West of trying to pressure it over the case, while a judiciary official said she was in "perfect health" and her case was still being reviewed.

"They (Western nations) have become so shameless that they have turned the case of Sakineh Mohammadi-Ashtiani, who has committed crime and treason, into a human rights case against our nation," foreign ministry spokesman Ramin Mehmanparast said.

"It has become a symbol of women's freedom in Western nations and with impudence they want to free her. Thus, they are trying to use this ordinary case as a pressure lever against our nation," the ISNA news agency quoted him as saying.

"The other side is only looking for pretexts against the Islamic establishment and if...we give into their demands they will assert, so there will be nothing left of the revolution and the establishment," state news agency IRNA quoted him as saying.

The sentence of death by stoning was suspended after it was condemned by the U.S., Britain and international human rights groups. The outgoing Brazilian president, Luiz Inácio Lula da Silva, an ally of Iran, offered asylum to Mohammadi Ashtiani but was rebuffed by the Tehran regime.

Human Rights Watch says Mohammadi Ashtiani was first convicted in May 2006 of having an "illicit relationship" with two men following the death of her husband and was sentenced by a court to 99 lashes. She was later sentenced to death by stoning.

In August, Mohammadi Ashtiani was put on state-run TV where she "confessed" to adultery and involvement in the murder of her husband, but her lawyer, Houtan Kian, said she had been tortured beforehand.

At the end of August she was subjected to a mock execution, according to her 22-year-old son, Sajad Ghaderzadeh. The following month, she was allegedly given 99 lashes after a British newspaper ran a picture of an unveiled woman mistakenly identified as her, Kian said at the time.

Ghaderzadeh, who launched the international campaign to save his mother in June, was arrested in Iran last month with two German journalists who had interviewed him about his mother's case. The International Committee against Stoning is also demanding their release and that of Kian, who is also believed to have been detained.

This account remains shocking, and beyond tragic. I deeply respect Islamic law, but this decision appears to be purely a political reaction to the furor that the initial sentence caused.

When I began this blog, I created my alter ego, “The Curator,” who would lead readers through the amazing and varied world of sexual behavior and beliefs without judgment, with as much neutrality as possible.

Not this time.

I had done this because I felt there were too many loud opinions about anything and everything and not enough information conveyed in markedly egocentric blogs. I wanted readers to decide how they felt, working hard to make The Curator as unobtrusive as possible, even invisible rather than a part of the process.

Not this time.

Enough! Enough fear. Enough pain. Enough agony. Enough torture. Enough death. E-NOUGH misery imposed by cowardly dictators hiding behind the safety net of blind religious tradition and the faithful.

I am a tolerant person. I believe that all countries have the right of autonomy, that religion is personal and should be left to believers to choose or reject, and that WEST does not always equal BEST.

I am not a Christian; I am not a Jew; I am not a Muslim. I do not follow any of the Abrahamic faith paths. I am not speaking out as an American, or a proponent of any political ideology. I am speaking simply as a human being, reaching out to other human beings. I am literally on my knees. I beg Iran and all Iranians to spare this woman as was promised. Please. Please.

— The Curator